Heather's Story

Updated as of
Wednesday, February 14, 2018 12 noon

God is certainly in the details and He has brought so many people into my life through friendship, church-life, and other survivors, who have “spurred” me on when I struggled to keep moving forward. I am Joyful to share my story with all of you today. Hebrews 10:24 says, “And let us consider how we may spur one another on toward love and good deeds.” (NIV)

While serving as a pastor’s wife for the last 20 years, I’ve seen all kinds of storms and deep challenges in others. Bliss served as a pastor at a church in Waxhaw for about 8 years and I was able to work with and pour into the lives of teenage girls and specifically Mothers of Preschoolers (MOPS), something I would never have had the courage to do, except for several ladies who spurred me on.

We all have a story and mine isn’t better or worse than yours. I really want you to hear me, It’s not about comparing… We all struggle… in our faith in the Lord, our marriage, parenting, work… you name it. James 1:2-4 explains that Struggles are counted as blessing and produce fruit, perseverance. We know storms will come.

As a young child, I made a choice and accepted Christ and set my foundation in following Jesus. When I was a young adult in my early twenties, I continued to seek discipleship and grow in my faith. I didn’t see storms on the horizon. I had dreams of marrying the man I had just met and fell in love with. On May 3, 1997 We were married; We fixed our eyes on Jesus and began our life together… The first few years of our marriage were just perfect…

“My Cancer Story”

In the fall of 2001, I was 27 and we were ready to start a family. During a visit with my OB/Gynecologist a golf ball sized cyst was found on my right ovary. Because it appeared to be a fluid-filled cyst, we just watched it for 3 months. Unfortunately, after checking it each month, it was still growing and I was scheduled for out-patient surgery, but ended up spending several days in the hospital and receiving the news that I had Ovarian Cancer, more specifically a very rare type called Granulosa Cell Ovarian Cancer. The surgeon removed only my right ovary engulfed with the tumor. I saw my first Gyn/Oncologist in Jan 2002 And, based on current available information for what I had, protocol was no chemo/treatment and it wasn’t expected to return for 20+ years. We were pregnant three months later and my son, Little Bliss (LB), was born Dec 2002, just one month after moving to Lancaster. As a new mom with new responsibilities, I quickly immersed myself into this new identity.

Just 2 short years later, I woke up hurting on my right side. We went to the urgent care here, and the doctor assumed it was my gallbladder. To my incredible shock after an ultra-sound, we discovered the cancer was back… but now in my liver.

And, this is where our storm really began.

Since then, I have had 6 relapses, 5 huge surgeries including 3 liver resections, ¾ of my stomach and spleen removed, and a total hysterectomy. After my hysterectomy, I felt like a different woman to both my husband and to my 2-year-old son. Something was missing and removing estrogen from my body seemed like all the nurturing and love went with it. As a young and active wife, it instantly took a huge chunk of passion and desire from my intimate relationship with my husband. In addition to that, I have also had 3 different rounds of Chemo, several non-chemo treatments, stereotactic radiation and traditional radiation. All of this has been very difficult and taxing on my body and each has created its own set of lasting challenges in everyday life.

Anyone who has suffered a serious chronic illness, or cancer, will tell you that it forces you to face up to this idea – life is short. BUT,

I know my life will NOT be shortened because of cancer. How did I learn this truth…

In 2011, at 37 I was facing major surgery for more than a dozen tumors. I was out of my mind scared. I was fearful of abandoning my husband, my son, my family. I really felt cheated, and I began to let fear consume me. While I was in the pre-op waiting room, I told Bliss I don’t think I will make it through this. It’s not fair. What if? – Nearly 12 hours later, as I awoke in the ICU… I knew God was NOT done with me yet! Over the next 2 months of recovery, God really showed me Philippians 1:6 … being confident of this, that he who began a good work in you will carry it on to completion until the day of Christ Jesus. And if this verse is really true and I know it is, then nothing not even cancer will cheat me out one single day of my life. God knows MY number of days on this earth. And, He knows yours.

This verse Phil 1:6 is so important to US in our Marriage. It is one of the very first verses we memorized together while dating. We even had it engraved in our wedding bands when we picked out our rings. I would have never guessed that 21 years ago this verse would be our lighthouse in the middle of life’s storm, our storm!

I had a choice, let the storm consume me and my family or trust God and choose JOY. I have a choice every day, It’s how we choose to react in the storm – we choose! We Get To Choose!

I chose to Fight with Joy!! I don’t just Survive; I want to Thrive!

When we are following God’s Word and praying to him about EVERYTHING, allowing the Holy Spirit to work in and through us, we will be able to Choose Joy in any circumstance. Having Joy doesn’t mean you have to be happy all the time. I have bad days, I get down… I am selfish… I make mistakes and then need to apologize to my husband, my son, my family or friends but, I don’t stay there!

I KNOW this is true because I am standing here today.

One of my favorite Christian Author’s, Margaret Feinberg says “Joy has nothing to do with our circumstances, though. Instead, Joy comes from the knowledge that we are Loved by God.” -Margaret Feinberg

Jan Harrison in her book “Life After the Storm” shares this; “God’s plans are NOT ALWAYS for ease and comfort, but they ALWAYS have an eternal purpose.” –

OFTEN I am asked the question(s)… How do you do this? How do you KEEP doing this? What do you do to find Joy?
STAY & PRAY Stay in God’s word daily. Pray – there are so many devotional options these days for busy life. But, you don’t have to be so busy! Making connections and friendships are worth the time put in, SO
Stay connected to each other who get you and spur you on…

If it takes more, get help…ASK!! I did…well, Bliss made me!
I needed to feel understood, like someone going through what I was going through… I found an ovarian cancer support group! Most times I went for me, but there were times I would go to encourage new survivors. I searched for 11 years and finally found a very small private survivor support group on Facebook – they all had the same rare type of Ovarian Cancer I have. I can’t explain the instant connection that happens when you meet someone who is experiencing what you are going through like doctor visits scheduled every 3 months, then waiting for lab results, scheduling CTscans based on lab results, then waiting on scan reports from your Doctor and Radiology. Then, these things I call “head-monsters” rare their ugly selves and start taking control and causing trouble. All of this can be madness!

The good news is that facing any storm can help you re-evaluate your life in major ways. Do you know Jesus Christ as your personal savior? Am I spending time with the people I love most? How can I make every day count? Am I glorifying God?

Think on these things and evaluate your heart today. Let me end with reading Habakkuk 3:18-19 for encouragement from God’s Word.

“Yet I will rejoice in the Lord; I will take joy in the God of my salvation. God, the Lord, is my strength; he makes my feet like the deer’s; he makes me tread on my high places.”
Habakkuk 3:18-1

AWARENESS
Since my diagnosis in 2001 the numbers haven’t changed for the better and there still is NO test for Ovarian Cancer. 21,000 new women are dx each year and 14,000 women die from this disease. That is 1 out of 72 women will be dx with OC. There is no cure. Although, an annual Pap Smear WILL detect Cervical Cancer and when treated early will save a life.

Some signs and symptoms are extremely vague.

BLOATING
Abdominal pain or discomfort
Difficulty eating or feeling full quickly
Urinary symptoms (urgency or frequency)

If these persist for more than two weeks go see your GYN – gynecologist

WHERE AM I TODAY? My body is a wreck, but I am comfortable and have not hurt with my new medication regiment. My mind is clear and I have had good days. I have some really good quiet time with the Lord. It has been a true gift. We’ve chosen No more treatment or surgery due to the fact that all options are very high risk and non-curative. Quality is way more important to me than quantity. I have a wonderful hospice nurse that checks on me once a week and my team is taking great care of me.

with love and joy,
heather steele

Purpose

I want to be intentional about making a difference in the lives of Ovarian Cancer Warriors. As a warrior, I have limited energy and monetary resources and I understand what challenges others like me may face. In my small but intentional way, I want to connect with my survivor sisters and bless them as I would want to be blessed.

Awareness

Symptoms of Ovarian Cancer

Ovarian cancer is difficult to detect, especially, in the early stages. This is partly due to the fact that these two small, almond shaped organs are deep within the abdominal cavity, one on each side of the uterus. These are some of the potential signs and symptoms of ovarian cancer:

Bloating
Pelvic or abdominal pain
Trouble eating or feeling full quickly
Feeling the need to urinate urgently or often

These are some of the potential signs and symptoms of ovarian cancer.

Other symptoms ovarian cancer can include:

Fatigue
Upset stomach or heartburn
Back pain
Pain during sex
Constipation or menstrual changes
If symptoms persist for more than two weeks, see your physician.

source: from NOCC National Ovarian Cancer Coalition